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Do you pledge the same allegiance?

This week was a little rougher for me. I don’t normally share a lot about my personal life with people that aren’t super close to me but here it goes.

Recently, I tried online dating. I went on a few dates. They were…interesting. One in particular was with a guy that revealed that he was agnostic. As soon as I heard that, the image of an ox carrying a teetering yoke appeared in my brain (if you’re familiar with the Bible, you get that). So I knew this wasn’t going to work.

I didn’t say anything right away. But when he asked me out again a few days later, I told him the truth.

He didn’t understand. After all, he was fine with dating someone outside of his belief and was quite angry that I wouldn’t. I tried my best to explain my reasoning but he refused to listen.

Recently, I was reading a Christian book about navigating dating. The author said, “Your allegiance determines your direction. Different allegiances equate to different directions.” If I were still speaking to this particular guy I would share this (even though I’m sure he still would refuse to try to understand).


“Don’t become partners with those that reject God.” 2 Corinthians 6:14

That doesn’t say don’t be friends or completely avoid them. Jesus didn’t. It clearly talks about partnering or joining. When you look up synonyms for partner words like, “companion”, “husband”, “wife” and “spouse” come up.

I like this translation because it uses the word, “partner.” The word partner is defined as “a person who takes part in an undertaking with another or others” Another definition is “a timber framework secured to and strengthening the deck of a wooden ship around a hole for a mast.” A partner is someone that you are meant to go through something with and that will make you stronger. If your partner is not pledging allegiance to the same thing as you, he/she could go in a different direction when it gets tough. They will not strengthen you.

I am perfectly fine with having friends that aren’t Christian, I’m fine with hanging out with people who don’t believe what I believe. But when it comes to navigating the world together, I need the closest ones to me to have the same allegiance.

Remember this when considering those that you choose to have closest to you. Do they strengthen you? Are they secure? Is this someone that you can make it through the toughest things life can (and likely will) throw at you?

One Comment

  • Katy

    I’ve been trying to find my way back to God and the Church lately (like truly not just “Yes, I believe in God but don’t do anything other than say that about it”). And I’m really proud of myself that I got that Ox reference 😉 My husband was raised religiously like I was but stopped going to church at some point, like I did. I think that he’s a little intimidated by my attempts at bettering my soul, but hoping that soon he picks up his side of the yoke!

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